Music

RESTART Playlist


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My musical spiritual cleansing, affirmations, I’m Gon’ Be Alright, Keep my Head Up, New Year, New Me playlist. Listen anytime you need a life detox, a centering of thy chi, getting back to the middle, or just a fresh start within!

May God’s peace & serenity be with you!

Style

Slipping, Falling, & I Can’t Get Up


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To you, on chance 1,000. Take 1,001.

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The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again.

Proverbs 24:16

After witnessing the wind getting knocked out of me, the Holy Spirit said, “Get Up.” My lips didn’t move while every remaining part of me responded, “but… i can’t get up.”

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Shame paralyzed my mind & my body.

My arms & legs weren’t bound. My hands & feet weren’t bloodied. And my bruised heart desired so badly to get up from slipping and falling. But my body went into shock.

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Throbbing pain sounded the ritualistic initiation of a new star being born into the pattern & lineage of my Unworthiness Constellation.

On back, I gazed upon each star representing a psychological scar of past.

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The crying of the newborn star diverted my wisdom to be gained by the grandmother stars. The grandmother stars said, “The first cry is a survival call. Don’t worry. You need your rest from experiencing pains of birth. Let the Father help you & hold the star.”

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Instead, I threw my Black Superwoman Cape on, & plastered on my Perfect Christian Mask as I wouldn’t hand over my newborn star.

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To the grandmother stars I replied, “Why bother the Father when I’m the mother? I can rest and learn wisdom of healing later. Right now, this baby needs me, & I’ll be fine.”

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Shame took me into isolation. Alone, I coped. I rocked the baby. I stayed up all night. I fed the baby. I cleaned the mess made. I did all that I possibly thought the baby needed, when all I needed was the Father.

I needed the Father’s presence so that I could heal & recover. I needed someone on my team; to help me rise again.

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The grandmother stars wanted me to gaze long enough to remember not just the stories of my scars but how the Father was there to help me feel, deal, and heal.

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I usually start my slipping & falling stories the same.

Step 1 into my old ways of coping is: ignoring the pain, thinking it will eventually disappear. Ignoring it also means that I will not burden anyone, even God; because in my world, emotional intelligence is not valued & best served silent.

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Ignoring my emotional health always leads to step 2: coping with anything other than taking chance 1,001 on God.

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Taking chance 1,001 looks like giving Him another chance to be there for you, to heal you, to help you, to pick you up, to teach you how to righteously fight back, or whatever it is you aren’t giving Him a chance to love you on & through.

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I initially never take another chance on God until I’m desperate & have exasperated all of my secondary ways of coping that never heal me.

Instead I get discouraged in looking upon the vast amount of stars & assume that God doesn’t want to give me another one of my unlimited chances of grace in Christ Jesus.

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But God is above the stars.

I want to act as a grandmother star & ask you to remember the last time He compassionately offered you another chance when you felt least deserving and hopeless; Now allow that to reframe your perspective.

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For though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again. 

Proverbs 24:16

The context of this scripture refers to the righteous & godly’s world falling, not the godly falling morally byway of sin. But I believe that after repenting, God even wants to help you & I rise up from the muck that you & I chose to return to.

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I want to encourage you that although you may be slipping, falling, & true to your heart, are paralyzed into believing that you can’t get up: You will rise up.

There’s hope, well because… Jesus.

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I wanted to encourage you that you aren’t alone.

You aren’t the only Christian slipping and falling, no matter how long ago you accepted Christ as your Lord & Savior. And if this applies, you aren’t the only black woman who can’t keep “it” together & appear strong 24/7.

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One of my favorite authors, Iyanla Vanzant, abbreviated PAIN as Pay Attention Inward Now. Stop & feel PAIN with the Holy Spirit to regain emotional footing, so that true healing may begin.

Take chance 1,001 & pray. Trust, from someone already taking chance 1,002.

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Wearing: Forever21, H&M, Nordstrom, Sam Moon, & Topshop. Photographed by: Yasmeen Frazier

Scriptures that are helping me Get Up:

Psalm 147:2-6

Psalm 130:1-8

Psalm 116:7-11

Psalm 103:3-18

Psalm 91:14-16

Psalm 91:1-13

Psalm 119:25-32

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“Everybody feels down or sad at times. But it’s important to be able to recognise when depression has become more than a temporary thing, and when to seek help. As a general rule of thumb, if your feelings of depression persist for most of every day for two weeks or longer, and interfere with your ability to manage at home and at work or school, then a depression of such intensity and duration may require treatment, and should certainly benefit from assessment by a skilled professional.

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Have you ever felt like you Can’t Get Up? Tell me about it in the comment section! I would love to hear how God brought you through a time of hopelessness. You can also leave a prayer or encourage someone below in the comment section!

I also would like to pray for you if you feel as though you can’t get up, please comment below or contact me here.

May God’s love comfort you.

Encouragement

“Lord, But I’m Not Ready”


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I’ve attended every Pinky Promise Conference since being incorporated; except this year, 2016.

Although I was in regret of not being in Hotlanta (as I sent crying emojis in reply to Pinky Promise sisters asking of my whereabouts,) a video recording of one of the sermons softened the blow; and the Holy Spirit still wrecked my tail right here in Dallas, Texas!

Honestly, truly, I am a true to heart bag lady physically & emotionally as mentioned in the sermon.

I would love to hear from you in the comment section of what resonated with you?

What has you saying, “Lord, But I’m Not Ready!?”

Style

No Angel


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I’m not as good as you think or say that I am. And I’m tired of hearing it. It can’t possibly be true. Especially when I need to plea on my knees that I be kept from deliberate sins because I can’t even know all of the sins lurking in my own heart.

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What’s true is that God is only truly good. So where does that put me? In the NOT bin with the remainder of humanity and God-creation.

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But I’m not truly good. And it’s no longer good for me to self-righteously think that I am. Nor is it healthy to compare worth of myself to another whom through my mere human point of view, I count as good; but if I were to have a spiritual perspective, that individual is as pleasing to God through faith. Thankfully because of Christ’s sacrifice only.

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For me, good is comfortable, non-challenging, and a destiny. Fortunately, a destination I couldn’t have ever met without the gift of salvation from Jesus.

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Good visually impaired me. However it made the senses of the nose more effective in detecting the stench of sin being left behind when my good thoughts of myself didn’t align with the reality of my wicked heart.

Never am I in singular, good. Only I AM. Not I. That’s why if you see any good, it’s God.

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May I blow a trumpet for the Lord only, and never boast in anything but Him. May I remember that good is not a destination because Christ has already made me good with the Father. But may I also remember that I am on a journey that Jesus will perfect by His Spirit, not by the physicality of my flesh and the help of a visual impairment of self-righteousness.

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Take a good look, friends, at who you were when you got called into this life. I don’t see many of “the brightest and the best” among you, not many influential, not many from high-society families. Isn’t it obvious that God deliberately chose men and women that the culture overlooks and exploits and abuses, chose these “nobodies” to expose the hollow pretensions of the “somebodies”? That makes it quite clear that none of you can get by with blowing your own horn before God. Everything that we have—right thinking and right living, a clean slate and a fresh start—comes from God by way of Jesus Christ. That’s why we have the saying, “If you’re going to blow a horn, blow a trumpet for God.” 1 Corinthians 1:26-31

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Wearing H&M, ZARA, Sam Moon, Topshop, & Forever21.

I love comments so tell me what you think! May God’s grace be with you.

Quotes

Greatest Teachers


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A top stylist posted this quote on their instagram this morning, and it resonated well with my soul. I can truly say, thanks to my greatest teachers. And thanks to THE greatest master teacher, Jesus. Lessons on lessons in my current season, & I must take heed.

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Don’t you agree? Tell me in the comment section.

May God’s grace be with you. XO, Kali

Style, Travel

Mardi Gras 2016


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Day 1!

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We made it to New Orleans on a Wednesday. We being my framily which includes siblings, coworkers, family friends, close friends, associates, and new faces. We were starving as soon as we touched down to New Orleans, so we went to our favorite New Orleans spot, the Praline Connection after checking into the Westin on Canal Street. After filling our tummies, we walked down to Canal street to see the evening parades as they just began to roll. Being that we were at the end of the parade route, we decided to kill some time on Bourbon street where we rode mechanical bulls, danced to cover artists and their live bands, and sang karaoke at the Cat’s Meow until 5AM.

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This jumpsuit onesie from Forever21 was perfect for travel woes and straight to the streets. Comfort is most important for traveling due to many factors, so I understand that style is usually compromised. But no longer will it have to be with a jumpsuit as this. You can also pair this jumpsuit with your favorite trainers. And my favorite travel tip to save space in your traveling gear is you and your travel companions wearing your furs on the plane.

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Day 2!

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Sick ALL day! I’m such a grandma. My day to day life involves me going home to my cats after work and having a decent bedtime with an early rise. So staying out until 5am singing Karaoke after a day of traveling KILLED me. I finally started to feel better around 8pm which was just in time to dance in Willie’s Chicken Shack on Bourbon.

My popsicle jumpsuit from ASOS was perfect for a day of recovery from the previous night. I had my red ASOS coat on for the day until a family friend stated that it to be wise to change back into my longer coat since day two was colder. So before I left to for the night, I changed back into my black and white ASOS coat.

Sad Side Note: My friends and I knew that Solange was going to be on a parade this night, however, none of us were in a rush to get to her and got distracted by going back to the Karaoke spot to perform Bootylicious by Destiny’s Child. It was great as we performed whatever we remembered from the video, which was enough because 3 out of 5 of us were Houston girls.

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Day 3!

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Initially my framily planned on having a theme of Black Hollywood for the Zulu Ball. I dedicated to stick with it, and put a modern twist so that it wouldn’t seem like a costume.

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My eye spotted nothing other than red this year while dress shopping online and at grapevine. And I also love a monochrome look. The beautiful jewelry from Terry Costa helped with the vision I had for myself with jewels and stones. Also the opera gloves were fun thanks to those at Dallas Vintage Thrift. Off the shoulder sleeves helped balance out my hips and overall pear shape along with the trumpet style on my gown.

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Ruth styled my hair & did a wonderful job on my makeup for the Zulu Ball. I only asked to make sure that I had a red lip and deep pregnant Kim Kardashian contouring. She did that + more.

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Sad Side Note 2: Solange and Gang were at the Zulu Ball as well. Did we see them? No. They must’ve been in the other VIP across the stage.

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I had a great time dancing with Uncle Charlie Wilson, singing sad love songs with Deniece Williams, and bouncing with Juvenile. Also I lived for the second line before we had our seat and dinner.

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Day 4!

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We rose early to go to the Westbank for the NOMTOC parade. We make sure to leave the inner city to be apart of another culture within New Orleans.

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No makeup and a neutral style in fashion meant a pop of color with my favorite Zara shades that I got in LA last summer.

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Get at least one fanny pack in your life! They are important for events such as Mardi Gras or for the summer music festivals. I got my faux leather motorcycle jacket styled fanny pack from Sam Moon. It is originally a crossover bag, however I tightened the straps as tight as possible, and hooked it around my hips for a perfect fanny!

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Later that night after getting back to Canal, my sister rented a balcony on Bourbon street because the city is crazy crowded by the weekend. Bourbon is ridiculous to do on Saturday. You are body to body and it’s not fun as you attempt to get down the road. With the room, we ate delicious eggrolls, pasta, catfish, king cake and more. After pandora doing no justice 15 minutes within my arrival, DJ K$$$ (me) began to spin (create an iTunes playlist) and got the party started. It was personal like a house party, and that’s what I enjoy most. I love having a good time within an intimate setting with those I adore. This is probably the best night during the entire trip, which is hard to say because I honestly had a great time every night in New Orleans.

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Of course with Mel, it’s a photoshoot.

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The style goal when traveling to New Orleans during the Mardi Gras season are multipurpose looks. It’s imperative to have a dual fit. Day to night all in one based upon your day. You are having so much fun as you walk around, laugh, eat, dance, and your entire time is spontaneous, so your look must be ready for anything. Plus who has time to take out of their good time to change looks by going back to the hotel? It’s not that serious. To me, it’s all about looking festive and celebrating with the New Orleans people.

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I highly recommend Doc marten’s, Converse’s, or any comfortable shoe that you do not mind possibly getting dirty and worn in while in New Orleans. Anything with a heel is dumb, dumb, dumb! Do not even pack them, unless you are going to a krewe ball. But I end up switching into my Puma trainers anyways at the ball.

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Two films because both are amazing edits by Melanee Brown!

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I went for a pink wig because I have been craving the look for years! However, after college and while you are adulting, the opportunities are slim to have a successful professional life with pink hair unless you are working within an industry where it is acceptable. That’s not my life as of now, so 5 days on vacation was fulfilling.

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Day 5!

Vamonos! We had an early flight so we literally woke up and got ready to go straight to the airport and back to Dallas to watch the Super Bowl 50. I had such an amazing time and love the magical city of New Orleans. We couldn’t help ourselves on the last night but to begin planning Mardi Gras 2017!


All photos were taken by the amazing Melanee Brown excluding Day 2, which were blackmail images from my brother… the only image I had of my look. Click here to check out other images from our New Orleans trip that Melanee Brown photographed.


Have you ever visited New Orleans? What about Mardi Gras? Tell me about your experience in the comment section!

May God’s grace be with you!

Style, Travel

Ride Around in that H-Town


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Day 2!

After the proclamation I got the amazing opportunity to work with two sick photographers. All they were needing was a subject, and I was thanking God to be available.

Due to unforeseen weather that caught us en route to the photoshoot, we had to scout a new location. As we drove around Houston, I got a chance to become more familiar with my two photographers for the day. What a lucky gal right?!

You can tell by now that I love my girl Melanee Brown. She is the first photographer TheKingKali.com had since being birthed by God. She makes me comfortable through insecurities. She is extremely patient and professional, although she doesn’t have to be because we are homegirls. I love her eye and will always be a big fan of her work. You can check out Melanee’s photographs from our day together below and check out her portfolio here!

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Because Melanee is such a humble and hardworking beast, I had the opportunity to meet Eric. Eric agreed to meeting with Melanee to teach and collab. I am so glad that I met Eric. Eric is this amazingly witty, and genuine creative. We discussed future goals, our travel experiences, and our personal occurrence of our previous night with Solange. We also discussed where we were from that was accompanied with relatable family stories. 87% of this conversation was delivered through sarcasm and laughter. After having a fun experience of working with Eric, then did I get to know more of him through his website. This post revealed how much more brilliant he is, and why I am glad to have met him. You can check out Eric’s photographs from our day together below and check out his portfolio here!

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Wearing H&M & Puma X Solange Trinomic XT2 Trainer

After the photoshoot, I grabbed my favorites to-go’s for my sister Mithi, nephew Aiden, and for myself, which are Timmy Chan’s & the Shipley’s on Ella. Then the three of us got on the road to Dallas AKA Triple D.

It’s interesting to see the end result to an artists eye. I’m definitely using these amazing images for marketing purposes. Thank you Melanee, Eric, and CJ for such a fun, productive, and freezing day out. I wouldn’t want to ride around in that H-Town with anyone other than you guys.

A trip to Houston is always refreshing for my roots. Have you ever traveled to Houston? What do you love to do when you ride around in that H-Town? Comment below telling me what you like to do and what you love about my hometown.

May God’s grace be with you!